(WARNING: This blog contains EXTREME movie references. Sorry...it was that kind of morning.)
There comes a point in every fame junkie's career where they realize that sooner or later the roller coaster pulls back on to the landing pad from whence it launched. It's then up to said junkie whether or not to purchase another ticket, get back in line and give it another go. The ride itself though is absolutely intoxicating. It's a drug much wilder and incoherent than any known to mortal man. It's the kind of drug that knows no bounds nor limits and is unable to be contained nor controlled. It's the deep breath before the first kiss. It's the last thing you see before the bullet leaves the barrel. It's the sound and feel of wild wind rushing by your face before the dull thud at the bottom of the empty well. All of these things at the same fuckin' time...maaaan.
So what does one do when their "viral" video starts sputtering like a weed whacker with a bad spark plug? Sure- you're still looking at a couple of thousand new views each day but that's nothing compared to the rush of those first thirty or forty thousand. You're like a crackhead at this point. Anything for one more bump. Just a little kick up in the numbers. Like Leonardo DiCaprio turning tricks in the Basketball Diaries. Something just to get you to a buck and a half. One hundred fifty thousand views. C'mon baby...come to papa. You're soooooo close now. Just another fifteen grand. But if you get to one-fifty, next it'll be two hunny. And so on...
Greed. Pure, unadulterated, bad to the bone, raw, unchained greed. That's all it is. As Marcellus Wallace put it so eloquently in Pulp Fiction, "That's just pride...fuckin' with you".
And you can't control it. It eats away at you like a tiny little bug that crawls into your brain as you sleep (like the thing Ricardo Montalban put in that dude's ear in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Kahn) and plants silly ideas in your head like, "Hey- at this time next year you'll be in a limo at the Grammys". Fer sure. No bout' a doubt it.
And then you wake up. Or...you choose to stay dreaming. I'm gonna opt for the latter if that's okay with you.
Because quite honestly, I can't tell the difference at this point. It's all the same to me- reality/dreamworld. Whatever. I fell like I've eaten the red AND the blue pill. As long as I can believe that there's something over the next hill. Something better or more exciting or different than everything I see every day of my normal, boring life. To quote Patrick Swayze in Point Break, "Some guys snort for it, some people jab a vein for it, all you gotta do is rap for it." Or something like that...
People keep asking me, "What's next for the Dr."? Here's what's next. The Dr.'s going to pop his head out in Western Massachusetts one last time over the next couple of weeks. He's gonna go drink at a few of his favorite joints. He's gonna spend some time with his friends and cut loose a little bit. He's gonna do what he's been doing since day one. He's gonna take a good, long look around and soak in the "413". All of the bustling restaurants in Northampton at 8 o'clock on a Friday night and the empty diners in Westside at 3am on a Wednesday. All of the country clubs and all of the dive bars. The McMansions in Longmeadow and the flats in Holyoke.
Then I'm going to lay low this summer. I'm going to go to the beach, write lyrics, work a day job, continue to keep all y'all informed of my situation via this blog. Y'know- keep it real.
And then I'm gonna come back. Bigger. Deffer. Badder. And this time...it's personal.
September- back in the studio to record a few new tracks. October- start work on the follow-up to the "413" music video. Late October/November go on tour ONLY in Western Mass. Sometime in November, drop the sequel music video to "413". End up the year with a HUGE New Year's Eve show somewhere in W. Mass (assuming the end of the Mayan Calendar on 12/21/12 doesn't spell "curtains" for us all). Then re-asses things for 2013, rinse and repeat.
So those are the plans for now. But you know what they say about "plans". Either way, hang on to your hats W. Mass. It's gonna be a hell of a ride. And you're all coming along...